dance code poetry radiate splash paint.
spasm nostalgia create die flame gym.
pump iron contract the cosmos powerful like a supernova multiplied by itself.
ten god times.
fame sex orgy crush kittens. but be good.
i sweep creation. i span existence. i be all. i crush meaning.
contract memories deep sweet happenings crystallized.
my life is more beautiful than yours. my life is perfect.
truth highest? hah! truth is jackshit. way too many turtles. truth is a lowly turtle.
be my own blood! yes! COURSE through me!
give my food. nourish. erase pain. make you JOYful.
agenda-less dance.
wa wa wa… stupid vocal language. smash verbal, violence speaks truly.

Sweet memory
Of an ordinary rainy day.
Got off work
Stepped into a bus.
Clear, peaceful, alone.
Rain pelted my ride
Through empty neighborhoods
Of big trees and good people.

My few years still
Light as the clouds.
But old enough to know
It’s just me and the world,
Forever just me
And my being in the world.

When the tumult is over,
When it’s time to condense,
To curl up, hold tight and let go,
Is the universe any different
From that lone moment
Of pefect being?

A cartoon from xkcd reminds me of how I feel. On the one hand, there is nothing to be said beyond the voidness of existence. On the other hand, I hate people for moving on when I talk about it.

Don’t meditate to calm yourself. Meditate to push against the membrane that encloses you. It is not conceivable to me that anyone will have any success breaking through it. But I encourage you to close your eyes and try until your mind is reduced to an exhausted lump of flesh. (It might be a good idea to clear your schedule for the next hour or two before you start.)

The walls are unyielding. Beat against them nonetheless. If you need a motive, use this: if you flog your brain hard enough, you may be granted the sensory illusion of having broken through, which is a special (if merely chemical) experience.

Life is a law of our universe, like the mathematical, physical and chemical laws. When conditions are right, stars explode into supernovae. When conditions are right, stuff organizes itself into life. The gap between animate and inanimate came pre-bridged. Obligatory Carl Sagan quote:

“We’ve begun at last to wonder about our origins, star stuff contemplating the stars, organized collections of ten billion billion billion atoms contemplating the evolution of matter, tracing that long path by which it arrived at consciousness….”

Intelligent Design proponents are bothered by the thought of complex life being common self-assembly of star-stuff.

It makes no sense to be bothered by the spontaneous evolution of complex life forms when nothing is or can be understood about the ultimate reasons for the existence of mathematical and physical laws. Math, physics and life are just the way the universe behaves. They are all spontaneously complex, on their own.

Existence is no more or less bewildering because of the presence of life. Max bewilderment is achieved just by having anything be.

I check out Hugh MacLeod’s blog occasionally. He makes nice cartoons, and this one is so very on-topic here.

In discussions on the meaning of existence, it is often said that we do not know what we live for, but it’s a good idea to live well. I agree with that statement, but it also makes me mad to hear it in the context of existential inquiry. Prescriptions for living have no importance in this context. Existential inquiry ends fruitlessly at the inquiry, and should not come with adornments or consolation prizes. That is why isism.org puts all of this crap under “Everything Else.”

I want to hear more people acknowledge complete befuddlement and just stop right there instead of proceeding to wrap that statement up in a bloody BOOK.

Don’t be afraid of having a closed mind, being a hypocrite or contradicting yourself. You don’t have to be patriotic. You must not do evil. After the age of 30, don’t yammer in subjective discussions to which there will obviously be no resolution due to your intervention. Always remember that you would be a savage were it not for those who have lived and thought before you. Don’t be afraid of being contemptuous. Only once in your life, pick up a thick book of learning you’d like to read, estimate how long it would take you to read it, think hard for that long, and never read the book. Invent a new form of dance and practice it with and without body movement. Don’t be afraid of thinking vile, evil, dirty or perverted thoughts. Be good, kind and pleasant. If you release any children into this world, make very sure you train them to be good, kind and pleasant. Give me minimum trouble.

When a person says “I believe in God,” he is really saying “Neither I nor anyone else I know of can make sense of existence.”

Let’s say you don’t know squat about nuclear physics and you are asked to give a lecture on it. You go up on stage and say “Nuclear physics is a complex and difficult subject, so let’s call it ‘Timmy’. Thank you.”

That’s “God.”

Saying “Science cannot make sense of existence, so we need to turn to God” is like saying “The dictionary doesn’t explain what the monkey painted, so we need to do us some scuba diving.”

It makes no sense to worship “God” or be thankful to “God.”

It makes no sense to say “I don’t believe in God.”

“Belief” in “God” gives much peace to many. Getting peace and happiness is a good thing.

That’s all on “God.”

God, I hate the number of quotation marks on this page.

I really should have titled this “Why Live?” If you have tasted existence as I described it, death is no great calamity to you. Don’t let this lead you into the mistake of hastening your death. Staying alive is a sound strategic move. (Ignore any arguments for staying alive based on the claim that staying alive is fun. That is like saying tea is tea.) Death is inevitable. Explore life as much as you can; live it out, if only to check if there’s any value in it. Don’t be in a hurry to die.

It’s not easy, however. Some things that may help: entertaining yourself in the realm of thought by flinging your body down hard on the ground, writhing like a fish out of water, spinning at a very high rate around your vertical axis or grabbing your planet and flinging it away. Such diversions release dangerous accretions of energy. I frequently employ these tactics to sublimate the urge to run amok and shatter myself against some object.